Well, Holy God, a gerral from Longford has just gone into the Villa! That was a Midlands accent, YAS! Don’t worry, we’ll get to Sherif’s impromptu departure for unspecified “rule breaking” in due course, but a girl from LONGFORD, wha?! Here’s the skinny…
Maura Higgins is a 28-year-old model from, yes, the Midlands. As for what she does, she’s a “model and grid girl.” WTF is a grid girl I hear you cry? The most widely used definition is “a female hostess at motor racing events.” So, totty.
She’s been in a nine-year-relationship; she can’t cook; she talks over people (herself and Molly-Mae will get on like a house ablaze); she’s very caring; good girlfriend material; and rates herself a 7/10 for looks, with her eyes being her best feature. She fancies Chris Hemsworth (watch out, Lucie, you could have competition for Lizard Lips); is a Bryan Adams fan; doesn’t like quiet blokes because she has to do “all the talking” (on the plus side, she wouldn’t be talking over them). Lastly, she would “go extreme” to get the man she wanted in The Villa, yet is a believer in “girl code.” She finds arrogance a turn off (she’s in the wrong place, so) and whoever she’s into must be about “the craic” and – of course – “the banter.”
Maura hasn’t gone in alone. Her partner in lime is a 26-year-old “eyelash technician” from Essex by the name of Elma Pazar. I’d run through all the interesting facts about her, but I’ve limited space and we’ve yet to discuss tonight’s other happenings, plus the fact that a certain someone who’s been pretty much AWOL since Sunday.
So there we all were. Breath bated, waiting for all the lowdown at 9pm…
But, can you believe it; scant Sherif info… Arguably the most interesting thing to happen in the Villa thus far this series and, for some reason, producers haven’t capitalised on it. What did he do?! When did it happen?! How did it happen? Who was involved? WHAT DID HE DOOOO??? One thing we can assume; it must be pretty damn bad not to be included in the show.
A press release was issued earlier today saying he’d “broken rules”, but it failed to disclose exactly what happened. At the time the news broke, yours truly (plus anyone else with an ounce of interest) assumed it would be a pivotal story arc for tonight’s show. And, as tonight’s episode progressed, people had no choice but to make their own assumptions.
Approximately 90% of Twitter reckon Sherif was caught interfering with himself in the Hideaway hot tub, however, there are some rather more serious rumours doing the rounds regarding an alleged altercation with Anton that ended, well, badly. Either way, it needs more addressing than an arbitrary statement and one cursory line from Ian Sterling after the final ad break.
• After spending a toe-curling night in The Hideaway, and breaking in the bed (not really, they just had a VERY noisy snog), Curtis asked Amy to become his “half-boyfriend”
• Lucie and Joe got wet and wild(ish) on a paddleboard, and also decided to be “exclusive”, much to Amy’s umbrage
• Michael and Amber kissed, despite a chronic false start involving all kinds of rejection because she’d bad breath (she rejected him after he made a speech and everything)
• Curtis is now providing physical therapy alongside his line of talk therapy, kindly massaging Tommy’s “gluteal area” while straddling him from behind. He even used his thumbs. Such a professional
TWITTER TALKING POINT!
As ever, Twitter was alight with theories regarding Sherif. The overriding feeling was…
Chances are, Anton didn’t even wait ’til Sherif was gone before cracking on wiv Anna…
Love Island continues on ITV2/Virgin Media Two.
Read more: ‘I did a visual shoot for Liam Payne’ – read Irish Love Island contestant Maura Higgins’ full pre-show interview
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