I threw a bottle of Coke at my boyfriend when he called me a silly bitch

DEAR DEIDRE: I THREW a bottle of Coke at my boyfriend when he called me a silly bitch.

I know it was wrong, and now I’m really angry and disappointed with myself.

We were arguing about the fact he never says please or thank you, and how rude I find this.

He said I was being ridiculous and over-sensitive, and then insulted me.
I felt so hurt, I lashed out.

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This keeps happening. Instead of saying sorry, or acknowledging what upsets me, he just gets defensive and we end up fighting.

I’m 30 and he’s 32 and we’ve been together for five years.

How can I make our relationship better?

DEIDRE SAYS: You lashed out because he didn’t listen to you or take your feelings on board.

But as you know, there’s no excuse for violence. Read my support pack on Managing Anger.

Pick a calm moment and talk to your boyfriend, saying you’d like to sort things out.

Start talking about how situations make you feel, rather than lobbing accusations.

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