I billed my cousin for her wedding dress because she's pregnant – she says I'm 'cruel' but she should've told me sooner | The Sun

A WEDDING dress designer has been left reeling after she was accused of behaving unkindly toward her cousin.

She had no choice but to bill the young bride for a second dress when she confided that she was pregnant and the original design was never going to fit.

The net effect has seen her labeled cruel even though she wasn't told until very late in the day.

She was so distressed she took her dilemma to online forum Reddit seeking some reassurance over her actions.

"Am I the a**hole," she asked, "for charging my pregnant cousin for a new wedding dress after she told me about her pregnancy last minute?"

The overwhelming reaction from Redditors was one of sympathy for this designer who was in an impossible situation.

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She laid out the circumstances behind her decision.

"I own a bridal shop. My cousin is getting married in two months and I designed and tailored her wedding dress as a gift.

"She paid me for the materials. It [was going to] take another week to finish the dress, and I constantly updated her on the status of her dress."

Communication was key on her part and she regularly checked in with her cousin so see if she was happy at every stage and if she had any more ideas.

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"She would make the odd comment, but never anything major. The dress in total took me just over four months."

But a bombshell was dropped at a family dinner that left her staggered when her cousin announced she was pregnant.

"I congratulated her and her fiancé."

When the soon-to-be bride came for her final fitting, the designer warned her there was no way the original dress would fit as her pregnancy progressed.

"She asked me to re-tailor the dress[but] I told her I can't do that due to the intricate beading that I would have to carefully remove and re-attach."

There was a solution, however, and it meant a completely new design.

"I told her she might as well get a new dress as it would be easier for me to start from scratch and essentially I was just making her a second wedding dress."

The bride agreed and she was presented with an invoice for all the materials, tailoring, labor, and overtime, but this was where her problems began.

"She called me the a**hole for not understanding where she was coming from and said she would only pay for materials.

"I refused to back down. She left angry with her mom who later called me up to say [her daughter] was upset about not having a dress this close to the wedding."

She piled on the guilt and called her "cruel because this stress was not good for the baby."

There were over 600 comments to her post and there was universal sympathy for the designer and very little for the actions of the bride.

"I actually think it has a lot to do with not understanding just how much work goes into making a dress and the skills required," said this commenter.

"She probably thought it would be no big deal to just remake the dress. She’s completely undervaluing her skill set."

Another shared her view: "The cousin knew she was pregnant and probably yet she continued to let her spend time and money working on a dress that she knew wasn't going to fit her. Legit wasted her time."

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The bride was wrong, said this Redditor: "It’s not even just that she needed to know that she was pregnant in order to make the dress fit, [but] this bride wasted her time — a gift — and the materials by staying silent."

This person didn't mince his words: "Totally self-entitled. [The designer] has learned that no good deed goes unpunished and with some people when you give, they just take you for granted."

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