DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE imposed a sex ban on my boyfriend since I discovered his ex keeps sending him topless pictures.
She is a total nightmare and an attention seeker.
Every now and again she tries it on again with him and starts messaging him, even though she knows he’s with me now.
I’m 51, he’s 53 and she’s 49.
He always reassures me that he’s not interested but recently I came across some really saucy images she had sent him – some within the last few months.
If he wasn’t interested, why on earth has he kept the images?
I’m absolutely furious.
We’ve been together for three years, but she has made no secret of the fact that she’d take him back in a heartbeat.
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I’m so upset, I’ve refused to have sex with him for the past month.
He doesn’t see what all the fuss is about and I can’t see a way through this.
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DEIDRE SAYS: While it’s understandable that you don’t want to be intimate with your boyfriend after discovering he’d kept these images, withdrawing sex as a punishment is a precarious game.
Your boyfriend does need to appreciate how hurt you feel.
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While he may see no problem, ask him out of respect for you to get rid of them.
Explain he needs to really reassure you, for you to feel comfortable in your relationship again.
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