DEAR DEIDRE: FIRST I found out my brother had a fling with my girl-friend when we first got together. And now I’ve discovered he could be the father of my son.
I’m 29, my partner’s 32 and we met on a speed awareness course, where we sat at the back making bad car jokes.
It was strange how easy it was to talk to her — it was like I’d known her for years.
Within three weeks, we were spending pretty much every night together.
But six months in, we got a rather big surprise. She was pregnant.
It was an easy decision to keep the baby. I was falling in love and wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
Our son was born in March. He’s perfect.
Last month, my mum threw us a garden party so the whole family could meet its newest member.
It felt special to have my girlfriend on one arm and my son in the other.
As I was grabbing another drink, I bumped into my uncle in the kitchen.
He was hammered and slurred his congratulations. But as I turned to leave, he said: “Luckily, he looks nothing like your brother.”
He was too drunk for me to get any more out of him, so I called round the next day.
He tried to brush it off, saying he was talking nonsense. But finally, he told me the truth.
In the first month when we had been casual, my girlfriend bumped into my brother in a bar and they’d had a one-night stand.
My brother, who’s 33, told my dad, who told his brother — my uncle.
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I was stunned. How could two of the most important people in my life lie to me, for months? And what the hell will we tell our son?
I haven’t told my girlfriend I know yet but she knows from my mood that something is up.
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DEIDRE SAYS: To keep all this secret from you was cruel and unfair.
Consider getting this information confirmed by a DNA test. Cellmark (cellmark.co.uk, 0800 036 2522) provides confidential, conclusive, court-approved DNA tests.
If the child isn’t biologically yours, this doesn’t mean you can’t have a relationship.
Holding in this information won’t be doing you any good, so in a private moment sit your partner down and explain what you’ve discovered.
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