‘The second I walked through the door, I knew he’d died,’ says Joanna Chandler, from Essex.
It should have been one of the happiest days of Joanna’s life. After cancellations due to Covid, the mum-of-three was finally getting married to her long term partner, David.
But in the early hours of Saturday 14 May, 2022 – her wedding day – Joanna faced unspeakable tragedy when she discovered her dad had passed away in his sleep.
Her dad, also named David, had been fit and healthy, and showed no signs of illness when he died aged 75 – but the family later found out he had heart failure, and heart disease.
Now, Joanna, who lives in Romford, is raising money for the British Heart Foundation in honour of her dad, who she describes as her ‘hero.’
She says: ‘Dad was just the best, in every possible way. He was a builder and then a black cab driver.
‘He did everything and more for me and my two brothers. He always had the best advice in every aspect of our lives, and he decorated every home we ever owned.
As Joanna got older, their bond only strengthened.
She explains: ‘My dad and David built a house for us all to live in. My parents lived in an annex on the side.
‘He spent a lot of years renovating the house and was always up and down a ladder and never out of breath.’
‘Dad loved David and they spent many weekends together, having a beer, in the house and the beautiful garden that they’d worked so hard to build.’
And Joanna says her three children loved having their grandad so close by.
‘Dad loved being a grandad,’ says Joanna. ‘He had an amazing relationship with the kids and he and my mum were like second parents to them.
‘He did most of the school runs, knew all the school mums, and went to every club and spoilt them.’
Joanna and David got engaged back in 2010 – but sadly, the couple faced challenges ahead of their big day.
Joanna, a midwife, explains: ‘We had planned a big wedding in 2019 which we cancelled when we discovered my mum was ill with blood cancer.’
Despite that first cancellation Joanna and David still managed to go on their honeymoon – and her parents joined them.
She explains: ‘We went to the Four Seasons Hotel in Athens for a few days, then my parents flew the kids out to us.
‘We all had a week long holiday in a little town called Tolo, near to Athens. We made memories that I’m so pleased we have.
‘We then rebooked our wedding for the following year but it got cancelled again due to Covid. We joked that this time around it would be third time lucky.’
‘We’d scaled it down from a huge wedding in 2019 to a very small one in May 2022, with just 35 people at our house. Dad had built a pergola for us to get married under in the garden.’
The night before the wedding, groom-to-be David and their son, stayed elsewhere, while Joanna, her two daughters, and parents stayed at home.
Joanna and her mum, Barbara, stayed up late after everyone had gone to bed, finalising the finishing touches for the big day.
Joanna says: ‘When mum went up to bed around 2.30am, Dad didn’t move and she couldn’t wake him. She knew something was wrong and that’s when she came running to find me.
‘I phoned for an ambulance as I ran to their part of the house but the second I walked through the door, I knew he’d died.
‘He was sat up in bed with his glasses still on and the TV remote in his hand. He’d died in his sleep and the only comfort I had was knowing that he looked so peaceful, so he wouldn’t have been in pain.
‘He was such a fit and well man and hadn’t had a single symptom to indicate anything was wrong.
‘It didn’t seem the right time for him to have gone.’
Joanna then had the awful task of her breaking the news to her children.
She said: ‘We told the kids one by one as they woke.
‘It was horrendous considering the high they were all on, so excited about the wedding. They’d all been involved in the prep.’
When it came to their nuptials, Joanna says it ‘seemed obvious’ that the big day they’d planned wouldn’t go ahead.
‘We called off the wedding,’ says Joanna. ‘But that afternoon my husband said, “Let’s just go and sign the papers,” so we went to the registry office with my two bridesmaids and brother.
‘I’m still not sure how we even managed to sign the papers but it just seemed the right thing to do.
‘We both knew we’d never get round to getting married otherwise – we’d been together about 15 years and engaged for 12.’
And despite the heartbreak, Joanna says she has happy memories of her wedding day.
She says: ‘As strange as it sounds, we had a lovely evening as all of our family was with us and we had a celebration of Dad’s life.
‘Dad was a very social person and we hosted lots of garden parties, it was what he would have wanted.’
Now, Joanna is running the London Marathon on 23 April to raise money for the British Heart Foundation.
‘Hopefully in the future scientists and researchers may discover a test or wonder drug that might be able to help.
‘Being part of team BHF gives me something to run for. The charity is so meaningful to me and knowing I’m raising as much money as I can to help research continue will help to get me round.’
Three weeks after Joanna crosses the finish line, she’ll be marking her first wedding anniversary – and the first anniversary of her dad’s death.
She says: ‘It’s strange to think that our wedding anniversary is the same day my dad died.
‘We’ll celebrate the anniversary the only way we know how, by raising a can of Bud for Dad, and champagne for us, in the garden, listening to his playlist in the spot where he always sat.’
Heart failure occurs when the heart is not pumping blood around the body as well as it should, most commonly when the heart muscle has been damaged. This means your body is not getting enough oxygen which affects how your body works, including your breathing and muscles.
It’s estimated that more than 900,000 people in the UK have heart failure and there are around 200,000 new diagnoses of heart failure every year in the UK.
Karen McDonnell, Senior Events Manager at the British Heart Foundation (BHF), added: ‘We never fail to be inspired by the incredible stories of our supporters, and Joanna is no exception.
‘Every single step our runners take will power science with the potential to beat heart and circulatory disease. We’re extremely grateful for Joanna’s support and can’t wait to cheer her over the finish line.’
Joanna is running the London Marathon on Sunday 23 April to raise funds for the British Heart Foundation. To donate, click here.
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