DEAR DEIDRE: MY 35-year-old daughter threatened I’d never see my grandchildren again unless I went along with her benefit fraud.
She used my address and phone number, telling the Department for Work and Pensions that she was living with me and couldn’t walk or work due to falling down the stairs.
It was all rubbish.
She was living the high life with her abusive partner, going on fancy holidays and eating in top restaurants.
I’m 58, retired from nursing and have always been law-abiding. When I told her I didn’t want any part of it, she said if I told anyone, she’d disown me.
I divorced her father years ago and had to give up my home. I now live in a council house. She asked me to visit her and the grandkids but she only wanted to gloat.
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She stood in her kitchen saying, “I’ve diddled the system and now I have a house and you haven’t”.
I walked out and haven’t seen her since. Am I wrong to change my will so she gets nothing?
DEIDRE SAYS: It is up to you who you name as beneficiaries in your will but your daughter isn’t doing anything to curry favour with you.
She’s gone down a path that you’d never advocate and was perhaps influenced by her partner, but she must live with her conscience.
If you’d still like to see your grandchildren, get support from Grandparents Apart UK (grandparentsapart.co.uk), a charity dedicated to help grandparents keep in touch with their grandkids.
My support pack on counselling will help you to find somebody to talk to in confidence about what has happened.
It would be advisable to talk to Citizens Advice Bureau (citizensadvice.org.uk) to ensure there would be no negative ramifications for you.
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