My fiancé proposed by handing me a ring and telling me it ‘should make me happy’ – now I’m not sure I want to marry him

• A28-year-old Canadian woman vented about her lacklustre proposal 
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A traditional proposal isn’t for everyone, but some women still dream of their boyfriends getting down on one knee and asking for their hands in marriage with a stunning ring to mark the engagement.  

One such woman, a 28-year-old living in Canada, took to US forum Reddit and revealed how her boyfriend recently popped the question – in a gesture she found underwhelming, to say the least.

She revealed the pair took a camping trip last year, and she was almost certain her 27-year-old boyfriend would ask her to marry him – but he took his time to pop the question, which then caused her to doubt herself.

After working herself up about the proposal (or lack thereof), the woman found herself sobbing alone in a kayak on the final day of the trip. It was only then that her boyfriend handed her the engagement ring in its box with a throwaway comment.

As she relayed the proposal to other people on the forum, she received support from readers who urged her not to marry her fiancé until she has worked out her issues with him.

An unnamed 28-year-old Canadian woman, who goes by the name @Temporary_Wish_7261 on American social news site Reddit recently relayed her traumatic proposal experience with her boyfriend of eight years (stock image)

She posted: ‘It was the last day of our camping trip, that I really thought he was going to propose. 

‘That evening he only wanted to go fishing so I sat in my kayak, probably 7ft away, and cried to myself for over an hour that it wasn’t going to happen since he didn’t propose at any beautiful hiking view points or sunsets through the week and we were leaving in the morning. 

‘When we brought the kayaks in after fishing until dark he went to the truck, came back and handed me a ring box saying “This should make you happy”.’

The disgruntled woman accepted the lacklustre proposal and the couple are set to get married in August – but not without resentment.

The 28-year-old continued: ‘Any time we have a disagreement or I feel unwanted by him I am just reminded of the disappointment I feel in regards to the proposal. 

‘I don’t even enjoy looking at my beautiful ring because it doesn’t bring me a happy memory’.

But she took matters into her own hands and took her fiancé to the same campsite, with the hope that he would redo the proposal to satisfy her, but he failed to even acknowledge their one year engagement anniversary.

To this day, the proposal has affected how she feels about her otherwise loving boyfriend who ‘has never treated me poorly and is my best friend’.

The poster later clarified that she wasn’t expecting a Hollywood gesture, and had even suggested her proposing to him over the years, but he ‘hated’ the idea so she respected his wishes.

Many Redditors were quick to show their support for the Canadian woman, quick to chastise her partner, although some felt she pressured him into the gesture.

One said: ‘“This should make you happy” is not a proposal at all. You would be well within your rights to give it back until he actually asks you to marry him’.

They continued: ‘Honestly, he doesn’t really sound like he likes you that much. Sad to say your resent to him will most likely continue to grow. Don’t get married until this is resolved’.

Another even urged her to return the ring to him and redo the proposal, warning: ‘If he hasn’t come up with a real proposal with in 6 months then you will know it’s over and you really mean nothing to him. So you will pack your bags and leave’.

However, not everyone was keen on this user’s advice: ‘That was a pretty contemptuous non-proposal; OP needs to look at the relationship itself and think about whether this is what she needs, not just focus on giving him stage directions for a new proposal’.

And others worried about the proposal story they would tell their future children: ‘OP should think about this, and think of it another way. Is this an engagement story that she wants to tell her kids?’

But one Redditor blamed the woman for saying yes to the engagement: ‘I don’t know why you said yes to that’, and another felt she was ‘hounding him for an engagement’.

And some took it even further, claiming that he proposed to her because he felt he had to after his girlfriend started crying: ‘He probably had something else planned and then OP starts crying and so he does it to make her happy’.

The user went on to say: ‘I think sometimes women, can feel like there’s this expectation that men have to do these loud, extravagant proposals as declarations of love and when they don’t they are disappointed.

‘You’re marrying the man, not the event. My ex did a beautiful, romantic proposal- all for “the gram”. It was to show other people, not for me. 

‘We divorced after a while because it was always about what other people thought about us, not what was happening behind closed doors’. 

They finished with some sound advice: ‘OP – talk to your partner, he’s the only one who can help here’.

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