I'm a parenting expert – how to deal with school gate meltdowns and tears | The Sun

DEALING with teary drop offs and school gate meltdowns can be emotional and draining for parents.

And for those who had children starting school in September, this may well be an entirely new experience.

But there are a few things you can try to help make things a whole lot easier – for both them and you.

Get up earlier

It's a good idea to encourage a healthy sleep routine – going to bed and waking up earlier.

"Hungry, tired kids are often clingy, cranky kids — in other words, kids primed for a school separation anxiety attack," the experts at What to Expect When You're Expecting said.

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So, instead of rushing in the morning, and shovelling a piece of toast and jam down them before running to school, wake up a bit earlier and prepare a breakfast that will help your child get through the day.

Porridge, topped with banana or berries, is a good, slow-release option.

Get them excited about school

If your child is struggling with not knowing what they're going to be getting up to during the school day, you can help them by talking about what might be in store for them as you head to school.

"Stay upbeat, don’t grill them with questions, and if you sense the conversation is stressing them out, switch to small talk," the What to Expect pros explained.

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And there are some things you absolutely SHOULDN'T say while taking your child to school.

"Whatever you do, don’t put any ideas in their head ('Don’t make a scene') or compare them with the other kids ('Ashley never cries at preschool drop-off')," they added.

Check in with the teacher

The majority of children who go through school gate meltdowns and tears are able to switch it off as soon as they get into their classroom.

But if your kids struggling to do the same, don't be afraid to contact your child's teacher to check how they're getting on.

It's important to work out whether your child is just struggling to transition from nursery to big school, or if they're having an issue with school in itself.

If it's the latter, you can request a meeting with the teacher and/or the school to discuss what can be done to help.

Give them something from home

There are various things you can give your child to take to school as a reminder of home.

Some parents sew little buttons onto their child's sleeve that they can rub when they're missing their parents.

Or draw a heart in biro on their wrist for a similar effect.

You can even print off a picture of their family to pop in their bag. There are lots of place that will print it onto a little piece of metal – like a credit card – to make it more hard-wearing.

And they don't have to tell their friends about what they've got in their bag.

It can often be enough for them to simply know that it's in their bag.

Stay positive

Arguably the most important factor – you MUST stay positive.

"Don’t let on that you’re worried or waiting for trouble at the school drop-off," the What to Expect experts said.

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"Instead, appear completely confident that your child will separate easily — say good-bye cheerfully and matter-of-factly.

"Then walk out without a backward glance (tough, but necessary)."

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