DEAR DEIDRE: I HAVE fallen in love – and my family has disowned me for it.
I’m a Muslim Pakistani woman and my fiancé is an Afro-Caribbean man.
I’ve never been so happy, yet all they can see is the colour of his skin.
We are both nurses and met at work.
We have been together for two years, secretly at first. I’m 27 and he’s 30.
I knew my family wanted me to marry within my community, but I thought they loved me and wanted happiness for me.
Naively, I believed that if I showed them what a good man my fiancé is, they’d accept our relationship. Instead, I’ve been cast out. They all refuse to speak to me, except my younger sister.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
Worse, I’ve had abuse on social media from other people in the community.
Given the racism my family has suffered, I’m shocked at how racist they can be. By contrast, his family has accepted me like a daughter.
Although I love my fiancé to bits and want to be with him forever, being rejected like this hurts so much.
I hate their attitudes, but I miss my family – and the thought that my future children will never meet their grandparents makes me feel miserable.
DEIDRE SAYS: You sound like a very strong woman and you have found a wonderful man. But that doesn’t make being rejected by your family any less painful.
It may be that they will thaw with time, especially if grandchildren come along, but there are no guarantees of this.
So you need support to cope without them.
Talk to Stand Alone (standalone.org.uk), which helps people who are estranged from their family. The organisation has support groups and workshops dotted around the UK.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
Carly refuses dinner with her boyfriend and needs to meet up with her mum
My hubby’s multiple Spanish trips were an excuse for affair – I’m devastated
Pictures posed by models.
Source: Read Full Article
